season!9 cas should be like THE REVENGE OF CASTIEL: HE’S BACK AND THIS TIME HE’S ANGRY where he goes on a storming grumpy rampage against metatron and rounds up all the fallen angels and they wage war to get their grace back and then he finds god and punches…
Was Spock’s reaction to Kirk’s death.
When Spock lost his planet and his mother, he shut down, thought with that vulcan side of his mind in a practical, logical manner. The only time he showed any feelings was when Kirk pushed him to the brink of rage. And that was just one moment.
But when Kirk died… Spock was enraged. He let the human side take over and he would have destroyed Khan if Uhura hadn’t stopped him.
It’s interesting how Spock losing Vulcan made him become more vulcan, while Spock losing Kirk made him become more human.
Such an interesting dichotomy.
Spock watching Kirk die. Spock knows the absolute fear and panic Kirk must be feeling, feelings that Spock learned from Pike. He’s watching his captain, his friend, die and for the first time in a long time, Spock feels empathy without a mind meld. For the first time Spock is putting himself in somebody shoes and experiencing the things they feel. And those feelings are absolutely terrifying. Not because they are feelings but because they are what his captain is feeling while he takes his last breath. The last things his captain will ever feel is the crushing pain, the blind panic, and pure terror of dying.
And while Spock is feeling the fear of death, not the loss but the absolute fear of dying, his captain is reaching for him trying to find comfort. But Spock can’t touch him, can’t save him. All Spock can do is watch his captain, his friend, die and know exactly what Kirk will feel when his heart stops.
That breaks Spock. Every emotion Spock has learned to subdue comes rushing out. Not only is he feeling what Kirk is feeling and reliving Pike’s death, he’s feeling his own pain and fear at loosing his friend.
He’s experiencing death from two sides: that of the dying and that of the watcher.
It’s no wonder he cried.